To Be Known

                          

Loneliness is a peculiar thing.  It takes on a life form that dwells within, crowding our space and  lingering  too long.  I don't understand it, or where it comes from, but I've certainly felt it. When trying to figure it out I wonder, "who is responsible for loneliness?" The one who doesn't put themselves out there? Or, others, who don't reach out? Are we all just a little too consumed with our own world? Too wrapped up in our responsibilities, worries, schedules, to make time for others? Or, are we plain wore out from all those same things?  Relationships take effort.  More work, more energy, to an already tapped out life.  Maybe it's none of those things. Maybe loneliness is just us feeling a void that is meant to be divinely filled.  An ache created to keep us longing for heaven and a future glory.

I have heard it said that what we really want in life is to be truly known and understood.  If that's true, wouldn't one orchestrate their life's dealings and interactions to promote and cultivate just that? Wouldn't one peel off the mask, release the shield, and bare the soul to be fully known? 

Recently I attended a national gathering for my denomination. The first one in over 30 years.  Attendance for those like me was not optional, so there were hundreds of us in the same place at the same time.  Brief and passing reunions at every turn and trip to the washroom.  During one of our meetings I was struck with the realization of how many people I 'know'.  Yet, at the very same time, how few I know and who really know me.  

Even more recently, I attended the funeral of one of our clients. A lady who battled depression and experienced loneliness in a dark and dreary way.  She believed she had very few people in her life and she was alone a lot.  The amazing thing was, the church was packed at her funeral. People came, filed in, cried and paid respects and remembered fondly this lonely life.  Did they know she was lonely when she was among the living?  Did she withdraw from attempts at community?  Or, were there even attempts?  I sat there puzzled and sad. Sad for her, sad for humanity. 

With a host of unanswered questions I choose to go with what I know.  What I do know for sure is that we experience an ache inside us because we live in a broken world.  A world that is longing for full redemption, pregnant with hope. If we focus on that ache we can quickly become pulled under and robbed of our peace and joy. The 'real' peace and joy, that deep anchor, unmoved by circumstances. Focusing on the ache cancels out hope. 

So what do we do with the ache we can't explain? The ache of loneliness or sadness or discontent?

1). Realize it is only a temporary ache.

2). Recognize it, feel it, but don't dwell on it or allow it any power over you.

3). Focus and dwell on the hope of future glory and heaven instead.  

4). Believe you are fully known, loved and understood by your creator.

5). Immerse yourself in the truth.  Some good starting points: Romans 8:18-39; 2 Corinthians 4:18; psalm 119:81; Philippians 1:21

6). Be the hope to someone else, bring community to the lonely.

Overwrite your Mind

Overextended.

Overtired.

Over-committed .

Over...whelmed! 

Feel familiar? 

How often in our own life do we walk around like zombies? Lifeless, defeated by life itself.  A depressing thought yet harsh reality.  How much of this one life to be lived goes wasted just trying to 'get through'? 

Is it ever possible to get it all done? To keep on top of all the demands, the responsibilities, the chores, without losing a piece of yourself?

How many people do we see, coming and going on a daily basis, stone-walled, emotionless, maneuvering through the rat maze? And honestly, isn't that us too? It's me, I'm guilty.

The fact is, balancing work and family and home and self-care can be downright overwhelming.  No matter who you are or how much you pretend it isn't.

Wait! I know, I know, it's about priorities. It's about doing the most important things. It's about boundaries.   It's perspective.  

How's that working for you? 

It's particularly hard when the 'priority' list is longer then the hours.

Here's the thing.  There will always be seasons of life that overwhelm us unless you're God.  However, speaking of God, I fully believe we are not meant to live that way.  According to His truth and His promises we are meant to live a FULL life, a life of JOY, perfect PEACE and FREEDOM from the overwhelming.

So how do we do that? 

I'm no expert on this. And, while I live with an over all sense of peace and joy and freedom and fulfillment, I sometimes forget it.  I am guilty of allowing myself the self-focused sorrow of being overwhelmed.

But.. (I'm so thankful I can interject here)

Recently my heart was changed.  I woke up to the realization that I can overwrite the pattern of my mind and exchange being overwhelmed for being overcome!

Here's what triggered this life changer for me;

The other day I was taking the dog for a walk.  To make this a more enjoyable experience I put the ear buds in and hit shuffle.  My shuffle will give me a wide range from Lady Gaga to Chris Tomlin.  Before long one of my favorite songs came on.  Although I've heard it so many times, I was wildly moved and overcome.   I was lost in the glow of his Majesty.  While The Digital Age continued to sing, Overcome, I was lost in who He is and how He's all I need.  I am overcome because He has overcome! 

It was an honest and raw worship experience that moved me toward change.  I knew in that moment I had the ability and the need to change my "overwhelmed" (self-centered) to "overcome" (Christ-centered).  If I choose to live in a sense of worship and awe of who He is and what He has done for me, then how can I carry on feeling overwhelmed with my one precious life? 

I know it won't be instant and I will fail many times, but I'm off to a great start.

Chin up people!

Check it out: 

Where is your Sting?

That time when winter came, and stayed.  Relentlessly digging those cold death claws deep within, gripping tight.  Barren, empty, dark, dead, each day hope weakens at the prospect of life, new, green life.

How long, O lord? How long will the wicked be allowed to gloat? (Psalms 94:3 NLT)

The ferocious weight of winter became too much to bear.  And then, in the silence the thunderous break. Cracking branches fall to the ground tired and sore.  Branches unable to bear the burden of crippling ice. It's deceptive beauty brings death.

Finally the wrath cools.  The claws loosen their grip. The deep dark ground warms and hope is restored.  Hope and grief coexisting in the same heart, the same life.  Hope of brighter days, bursting life and a new start. Grief over lost beauty, majesty and cool shade when it's time to complain about summer's blaze. Grief over mess. Work, more work on an already full and busy life.

Eventually the hope grows bigger, using more life to crowd out the grief. Life is birthed restored, renewed.  Fragile and weak but fresh, young and protected. The dance and chance of life begins all over again.

One day young Maple, you will be the strength in this corner. Your broad shoulders will provide home  for critters nesting and relief from scorching sun.

Until then we wait, we watch, we hope.

"So Lord what hope do I have? You are my hope!" Psalm 39:7

Fearlessly Fragile

Over the past few days I've been mulling over the reality of my own weakness.  However, instead of this being a negative, depressing thought, it has become very liberating for me.

 

Embracing my weakness gives me the freedom to surrender control (and I love control).  Embracing my weakness relieves me of the stress and pressure of having to be all, do all and please all.   Most importantly, embracing my weakness makes room for God to be strong in me, through me and instead of me!  It is such a comfort to know that in my weakness I am strong!  Mere me, who is weak and fragile, can claim fearless freedom in the strength of my Creator who IS all.

 

Over and over I have prayed for strength.  I pray for strength for my friends, my children, the grieving, the sick,  myself, the whosoever.   I'm changing the rudder in my prayer life.  I'm no longer asking for strength.  I've realized it's not about my strength, it's not about me.  Instead I will only pray that God's strength would be made perfect in my weakness.  That God's strength would flow through me and that I would readily see supernatural inexplicable things happen through a weakling like me.

 

Soak it in:

 

"But he (Jesus) said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.'  Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Crist's power may rest on me.  That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in my weakness, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.  For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

 

 

The Struggle of Morality

Have you ever considered morality as idolatry?  It can quickly become that if we are not careful.

Morality is defined as "right behaviour" based upon one's beliefs.  If someone has no beliefs or faith, they can still be a morally upright person.  Basically if they keep the law and show respect, they are moral.  Morals are in place by God and man to protect us from terrible things.  Where there are no morals people get hurt.

Obviously we want to be good.  We want and expect our children to be good and go through a lot of effort to teach them right from wrong.  We want others to be good too.

The problem with morality is that we can become too focused on our behaviour and how we perform.  We can easily become perfectionists and obsess about always doing the right thing and feeling like an utter failure, or loser whenever we mess up.  And quite frankly, we all mess up. 

When we are focused on our behaviour, we tend to transfer those same expectations on to others.  As a result we become judgemental, critical, intense, uptight and uncaring.  Who am I to decide how someone else should or shouldn't behave?  If someone is rude, reckless, self-absorbed or unconcerned , who am I to judge?

As soon as we begin to obsess about our behaviour and the behaviour of others, we become a "believer in moralism and not the gospel." (c.d. baker) .  For the Jesus follower, this is unwise and even an insult to the redemptive work of Christ.  Focusing on our behaviour is focusing on ourselves instead of on our Saviour. 

The Good News of Jesus teaches us that morality (goodness) is the natural fruit produced when we are in a right relationship with God. When we truly love him and allow his Holy Spirit to change us (thoughts, attitudes, beliefs), then the actions flow from that.  Sound moral living happens.

Jesus, thank you for offering freedom from the law and replacing it with incredible grace.  Thank you for knowing that I am not good on my own and for taking care of that burden for me.   Amen.

Living in Paradox

 

My Son took this picture during one of our many visits to the Bay of Fundy shores.   When I look at it I see stillness in action.  Peace in the noise.

For years I've been trying to figure out how to cultivate my 'being' in a life of 'doing'.  I tend to keep myself busy.  So much so, that guilt seeps in if I sit for too long.  When I'm really honest with myself, I see how I can easily find my worth and identity wrapped up in what I do. Danger.  This I know to be so flawed.  My identity and worth are found in my creator, who has embedded a part of himself in my DNA by stamping me with his image. 

When our identity is found in who he (Jesus) is, than all of the success and failure in life do not impact or embellish or change who we are.  Our 'being' is discovered and nurtured in those quiet times.  The stillness. 

God has been leading me towards a life which practices solitude and silence.  It is my goal to live the paradox of 'being' within 'doing'. To live a life combining stillness and action.  This has been one of the most difficult things he's ever asked my distracted self to do. It is in those moments that I cultivate my being. Those are the moments when God and I hang out and he whispers truth into me;

"My child"

"You are dearly loved"

"I created you exactly how I want you to be"

"Never will I leave you."

"Let go, I'll catch you."

"You can trust me".

"Do not worry"

"My peace is yours
claim it."

"My joy is complete
live it"

"My Grace is free
receive it

"Be still and know that I Am God".

In your daily toils of working, partnering, parenting, cleaning, cooking, comforting, teaching, guiding, playing, listening, watching, driving, studying, shopping and any other '...ing' you find yourself in, know this:

You are created by a God who wants all of your attention and who wants to give you all the love you need.

Jars of Clay

Hard pressed on every side but not crushed

Perplexed but not in despair

Persecuted but not abandoned

Struck down, but not destroyed